This Transgender Awareness Week, Tom* shares how EveryYouth’s Future Builders programme provided him with stability and the skills to live independently after a period of sofa surfing:
I’m Tom and I’m 20 years old. I grew up in a strict conformist Muslim family and I was the eldest of six siblings. I was basically like a third parent. I didn’t feel safe as a trans person. I felt like a caged bird – I wasn’t allowed to hang out with friends. One day my mum went through my phone and I was outed against my will. She threatened to out me to my father.
She threatened to kick me out of the house and the relationship became strained. I sofa surfed for a month around the time of my A levels. I was really stressed about where I was going to live; if I would have to pitch a tent or sleep rough in town. The place I was sofa surfing at was really unstable.
I reached out to AKT charity who referred me to my local EveryYouth charity in Bristol, 1625 Independent People, and I was told about EveryYouth’s Future Builders programme. I looked for entry level jobs and finally landed a job at my local football club as a server. I moved into 1625IP’s Future Builders accommodation about a year ago.
I applied for a cheffing apprenticeship because I knew I could afford the Future Builders rent while completing this. I enjoy cooking food, it’s a nice environment and everyone is friendly. I do a rotation of 10 or 11-hour shifts.
While at Future Builders I had a few appointments with job coaches and got advice on my CV. Staff helped me to secure work experience in January with an IT department in Redcliffe. When I first moved in I was very financially irresponsible. I was on Housing Benefits and money would be gone in a week or so, but now I’m saving up for a rent deposit. I’m hoping to move into a house share in Bristol.
I just love the freedom at Future Builders, I am treated like an adult. It’s great. I’ve never had my own room so it has been mentally so freeing and relieving. Living here also helps me to get a reference to show I pay rent on time.
I’ve also learnt about how to get the best value for money. Getting help on food vouchers and other pointers on where I can get food has been really nice.
Right now I’m focusing on training as a chef. I like working in kitchens, it’s fun. By the end of my apprenticeship I’m hoping to be paid a normal wage and work full-time.
My advice to anyone going through a similar situation would be never be afraid to turn to your friends for support. You can get emergency accommodation, and also, if you’re stressing about jobs ask your friends if they can recommend you to their bosses and look into apprenticeships.
Find out how we support young people like Tom with our Future Builders programme.
*Name has been changed.
